Ari and Jean (XO) in observation lounge
May 25, 2020 11:47:27 GMT
Post by Admin on May 25, 2020 11:47:27 GMT
Played out 5.24.20
LlewelPendragonToday at 4:47 PM
* * * * * * *
[4:49 PM]
She was in the observation lounge, her PaDD in her hands as she stared at the stars. A cup of lavender tea on the floor beside her where she sat leaning up against a chair. The computer would list her as in the location, but looking into the room, she wasn't able to be seen. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 4:53 PM
Jean was looking for the captain to have some items signed and walked into ther room where the computer told her she was. Looking around he didn't see anything at first. Decidedly he walked into the room some more to look around and saw her.
"Captain! Why aren't you in ther chair?"<e>(edited)
[4:57 PM]
Oh!
LlewelPendragonToday at 5:07 PM
She looked up, stretching her legs out, kicking her nearby boots to the side. "Stuck in that bridge chair often enough. This is comfortable." She glanced at the PaDD in his hand. "Need something?" She smiled up at him. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 5:09 PM
And there went her boots finally. Laughing a bit he sat down next to her and handed her the PaDD. "Oui. I need your approval on three items."<e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 5:18 PM
She took the padd and crossed her legs. "What's this?" She glanced at the files, reading then over. "Duty roster looks good..." she checked it off. "Go ahead and authorize Jensen's three days off. He and Akers agree gonna try and get permission from her folks to get married while we're here. His supervisor's already fixed the roster.... and what else?" <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 5:22 PM
"That is nice. I wish them the best and I will have my family send a crate of our finest to them. And the third thing is To move Commander Wulf out of VIP quarters to senior officer quarters where he belongs." He said the last thing flatly. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 6:29 PM
She looked up at him a long moment. "No..." Her hand held the padd back towards him. "He's more than a department head. He holds status equal to, if not above, you and I. He deserves to be in the quarters where we're located. Besides, his office is already set up in the room next to his quarters." She looked at him a moment. "Is it you don't like him in our corridor? Or you don't like him across from my room?" She wasn't angry, merely asking.<e>
CaptainFalconToday at 6:55 PM
He chuckled a bit. "To be honest like I always am to you, at first it was because it he was across from you. He doesn't need to know everything going on in this ship even if he is intel. What we or you do is our business and ours alone. But after having that meeting with him and finding how much he still thinks he is in charge, he needs to really know his place. He can have another officer in another room. Why does he need an extragavent room for his office when mine are far less superior to his and yours barely matches his? He is intel. The damn medic doctor can take control of this ship if she wanted to with any reason, does that mean we should give her VIP quarters as well? No. He is a senior officer like myself and deserves senior officer quarters. What are you going to do when we actually get enough guest on a mission that really do need those rooms Captain? Tell them to suck it up in the hood because intel is here and they are better then you all? I think not. I totally get where you are coming from but this is a big no for me. But you are in charge. He needs to be treated like a regular senior officer. I do not go back to Earth and to the academy and they start laying out the red carpet for me because I am an XO or in Intel. No. They treat me just like they would any other senior officer or senior advisor.
[6:57 PM]
I remember what you told me a cuple days ago while we were laying together and holding each other. I will make every attemp to be there and help him but I will treat him like a senior officer with experience not because he is intel and not because he used to be somebody on this ship before."
[6:57 PM]
I also have one more request after this one is resolved." <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 7:15 PM
Ari listened to him and frowned. "I think you are being a little over dramatic. We have never, in the history of the Bonnie ever needed the VIP quarters to that extent. And I won't make him move his office. It is already set up and the crew knows that's where they can find him. I will consider his living situation, but again, I make no promises. But I give you my word, I will give it a thought and let you know tomorrow." She cocked her head slightly, her body turned to rest her elbow on the chair she was sitting against. "So what is this other request?" <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 7:27 PM
He bowed his head. "Merci and I only ask that you think about it and I am not being over dramatic. I am French and we are always just the right amount of drama." HE laughed.
[7:33 PM]
I got word that Braumann entered the armory with a code. His former code to be more exact for when he was the chief before and the XO. For one, the code should always be changed whenever someone that has access to it leaves and the fact that it was not changed by the new armory chief since that long of a time ago is not very good. He also does not need the codes to the armory. He can store stuff there like anyone else and if he wants to request something or put something in there then it can be arranged that he be let in and let him handle business. But he does not need to know the code to that door specifically or any other for that manner. He can request access like everyone else and if he needs to some secret squirrel stuff then he can be alone, but again, NOT TO HAVE ACCESS to the armory or anything else that sensitive." He looked at her for a bit then continued. "I have been scanning my quarters and office for bugs and listening devices and I suggest that you do the same. Because you told me that he himself would not do it but if he was ordered to, then the obiendiant slave that he is, will." <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 7:46 PM
She frowned and took a deep breath. "First of all, I will not sweep my quarters. There is nothing that happens there that is anything I want or need to hide. And I do not believe Baumann would do such a thing whether ordered or not. He knows he can ask me anything and I will be honest with him to my very core." She angered at the thought of someone bugging her quarters, but she knew he never would. "As to his access codes. I reactivated them. His old code is the one he remembers so it just made sense. And yes, when he was harmed in the last mission, his codes were changed. But no... I will not revoke them. If he has something stored in the armoury, then he is doing it out of a courtesy to me. He doesn't have to store anything there. The safeguards on his office are far more sufficient. It's a matter of courtesy and trust that he puts it in the armoury. He cannot get into the ship's weapons' locker, only the room and his own locker. And I will not take that from him." She stood up and walked to the massive ceiling to floor and wall to wall windows that lined the observation suite. She crossed her arms over the crimson tunic top. Her black leggings almost disappearing against the darkness of space beyond her. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 7:57 PM
"Then That is fine. Just so as we are clear and now I know more." He got up and ent over to her but stood to the behind and right a bit because he saw her cross her arms. "So what now?" <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:09 PM
"I don't know how to make this work... us," she pointed to herself and him, "or you two or even him and I." She took a deep breath. "It kills me you two aren't crazy about one another, and it kills me he's forced into the position he is in because he didn't want some stranger in the position. And I don't know how to let someone care for me because it's been so long I'm scared to let go." She shook her head. "All three of us are in a bad place, Jean. And I don't know how to fix it." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:14 PM
He lowered his head and whispered. "I do not know how many times I have told you that you were not alone." Then he looked up at her reflection. "All I know was that I thought Iwas making some ley way into you trusting more and being a team member more. Then he comes in and it is square one again. Like everything I have saying to you doesn't matter now. Dosen't count because he didn't say it. All he is is an old friend that returned to the ship. Not the XO and not a love interest, just a plain old friend. And if you keep pushing me away like you and run and hide like you do, then you will forever be alone." With that he turned and started to walk away. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:21 PM
He was nearly to the door when she spoke. "You are right..." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:23 PM
He stopped and turned his head to the right but not his body and not looking at her. "Right about what?" <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:33 PM
She closed her eyes. "That I push you away. It has some to do the Baumann, but not entirely. Mostly, it's just me." She moved back to where she had been and sat back on the floor. Ari pulled her knees up and wrapped her around around her legs, her right arm fiddling with her padd beside her. "I won't lie. It's out me a bit out of balance having him back here. I thought he was dead. And I admit I pretended he was alive and well and married to some nurse who had helped him. I never asked about him after he left the ship." She sighed. "I didn't want to know he was dead. And now here, he is. Larger than life and with a job that took our friendship and warped it beyond all recognition. He won't open to me anymore because any day he could have to sacrifice me for the good of the ship or the Fleet. Or just plain lie to my face about something he does or doesn't know."
She looked up at him. "That's what we talked
about. When I didn't bring you to listen to his initial orders here. Because it wasn't anyone else's business. He has gone thru hell and back, alone, after his accident. And now he destroys the rest of his life and gives up any chance of happiness to be the Intel officer on my ship because he doesn't want to me have to deal with a stranger in a position I inherently can't trust."
[8:35 PM]
She looked back out the window. "And then that night we were together. You made me forget everything. No pressure, no nothing. I was no one's Captain, no one's keeper. I had no responsibilities and no conscious to keep but my own. And for that moment. It felt good." She smiled up at him. "It felt really good. But I don't know how to give more than that. I don't know how to do anything but just 'forget in the moment'. And you deserve so much better than that. And it kills me I can't. I don't know how." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:44 PM
He still didn't turn around but listened to her. "You also have to sacrifice the ship or crew for the good of Starfleet and you have to lie sometimes to keep certain things secret as well. That is not any different than him. I say you two should be together. If you can't be with me not only in mind as well as body, then I do not want you and I do not want to use you and I know likewise is the same. There appears to be true love between you two and no one nor anything should get in your way. Goodbye Captain." <e>(edited)
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:54 PM
"Good... then I'm alone again and it's finished." She took a deep breath, grabbed up her padd and headed for the door. She paused long enough to look at him. "Cause he won't have me, either. He doesn't want to care for me only to have to lie to me the next day, or throw me out an airlock on orders. So now you two can be great friends and enjoy your drinks and laugh over the Captain who can't make up her mind between the XO she doesn't know how to open up to, and the friend she can never open up to. Good night, Commander." She went past him, her shoulder brushing his chest in the tightness of the doorframe and headed for her quarters, her shoes forgotten on the floor of the room behind her. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:59 PM
He just shook his head and cried a bit standing right there alone in more ways than one before noticing her shoes. He picked them up and wiped his tears away the best he could. He went to her quarters and pressed the chime. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 9:02 PM
There was no command to enter, merely the opening of the door. Ari was at her desk, head down, gazing away from the door and out the window. "What?" She sounded tired and worn out. But she was also building her walls back up. She was calm and not crying. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 9:08 PM
He stepped in and wanted desperately to yell at her but didn't. "You forgot your shoes." He stated sitting them down on ther floor. "And you forgot to let me retort to your tantrum. Let me make this as perfectly clear as I can. I love you Ari. I would like for you to love me to. I cannot go an hour without thinking of you and not sexually. I love the moments that we share just holding each other or talking, even if it's about work. I am head over heels for you but if you can't reciprocate with mind and body, then I do not know what to do. All I know what and how to do is love you. Please let me love you and hold you?"<e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 9:17 PM
She looked up as he spoke. She stood up and moved to take the offered boots. "Thank you." She moved to the door to set them down. Leaning on the door, she watched him. Slowly she shook her head. "I don't know what love is anymore, Jean. I care for Baumann, I can't and won't lie to you about that. But with him unwilling to reciprocate, then it's not something I can find out." She looked at the floor. "But it's different with you. I can talk to you about anything." She laughed and glanced up. "Some things we don't agree on. But those things don't matter. I want arms around me. I want to sit on the couch and watch the stars and discuss shift rotations and dinner plans. To work out with someone who will laugh when I struggle and let me laugh when they show off. And if that's love... or leads to it. It's what I want. I don't know what will happen. I only know that's what I have to start with. It's all the foundation I have to give. And only you can decide if it's enough." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:35 PM
"Then let us go to the couch so I can hold you and watch the stars." He then just bent over and picked her up in his arms and went over to the couch and laid her down then laid down next to her and just held he tight against him. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:39 PM
She gasped in surprise as he lifted her. As they settled on the couch, she turned her back to him so they fit better on the narrow couch and her arm covered his as he wrapped around her. "Stay tonight... please." She turned her head to look at him. "I don't want to be alone. I want an arm around me, to remind me how it feels." She looked back at the table in front of her
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:42 PM
"As you wish." Was all he said and snuggled against her the best way he could and had to adjust himself so he was not poking her in the rear and then kissed her head. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:50 PM
A few hrs later, the lights dimmed from lack of activity, Ari stirred slightly. A minor jerk that left her tense a moment. Then she sighed and relaxed. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:52 PM
That woke up Jean whom did readjust himself and held her close once again and kissed her head and softly whispered. "I am her Madam. No need to fuss or worry. I got you." He then kissed her again. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:54 PM
She settled a moment, then woke up with a soft scream. "NOoooo. PULL UP!" she was panting and struggled in his arms. Still half caught in sleep, she didn't struggle hard. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:58 PM
He held her tight and kept her arms and legs from flailing around and hitting him. Once under control he then let her know again. "I am here Ari. Rest easy and do not worry. I love you." He then kissed her head again and kept ahold of her until she calmed down and then let go. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:00 PM
She slowly calmed and became still except for shaking. "Jean.." she rolled to face him, her face pressed to his chest. "We were tumbling into the back hole. It was all I could see on the view screen. We tumbled over and over and it kept getting closer... it was so black...." She sighed and shook her head trying to clear the dream. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:06 PM
"It is ok Ari. I am here and it was just a dream. Please. You are safe and in my arms. Nothing is going to happen to you. I promise." He then kissed her on the lips nice and steady. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:07 PM
Her hands gripped the front of his shirt in reflex as he kissed her. Her lips parting slightly as he pressed closer, <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:15 PM
He kept kissing her and passionatly to let her know it was all ok and she was safe and sound. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:31 PM
She melted against his body and kissed him back. When they finally broke the kiss, she reached up to touch his cheek softly. A soft smile perked up the side of her lips. "And already, you bring me comfort." She shivered and pressed her head to his chest. "I had almost lost them all. I was so foolish... had to be the rescuer. I almost cost everyone their lives, Jean." She shivered slightly in his arms. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:37 PM
HE kissed her head and held her tighter. "It's ok Ari. It's all over now and we are all safe. You are safe." <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:40 PM
She took a deep breath. "Keep me straight, Jean... can you do that? Don't let me get caught up in others to the point I forget those I am responsible for, first and foremost. Take me aside, tell me, make me see..." She looked up at him. "Can you do that? Can you tell me that flying into the darkness and unknown on some noble cause is only worth it if we all come out the other side?" She needed that. Millet would be there, on the bridge, constantly at her shoulder, in her ear, keeping her from leaping off the edge because the water below was shiny. With no regards for how shallow the landing might be. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:43 PM
"Oui. I can and I will Ari. I promise you that much." He then softly kissed the top of her head. "What do you want to do now?" <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:44 PM
"Will you come to bed and hold me?" She laughed slightly as she asked. "I don't think either of us will sleep well here." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:46 PM
"Yes I will dear." He then got up and streched then bent down and picked her up like before and carried her to her bed and laid her down and pulled the covers from under her and got into the bed as well and put the covers up over them and held her tight. "Oh. Did you want to change or something first?" <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:51 PM
She smiled, and laughed, as he once more scooped her up like a child. Once in bed, she nodded. "I need to clean up first. You are welcome to as well, unless you want to go to your quarters then come back... it's up to you." She slipped from the covers and headed into the bathroom and closed the door. The sink water was running a moment later. <e>(edited)
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:57 PM
"I do not have to go to my quarters but I do not wish to stay in my uniform." Once she got up and went to the bathroom he got up and stripped naked and got back into bed and waited for her. Unless she was going to take a shower then he would join her. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:01 PM
She didn't take a shower, but she came out in a thin spaghetti strap tank top and a pair of matching short shorts of deepest blue. Her face was freshly watched, the last remnants of tears were gone. As she crawled into bed she moved close to rest her head on his shoulder. She bit her lip then whispered softly. "Are you upset I did not come to be naked." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:05 PM
He kissed her. "No. In fact what you have on turns me on more than you being naked. But this is not about that. This is about you and I sharing intimacy in every form and by holding you tight tonight will be mine. What comes of it is up to you but I will try to restrain myself." She would feel his warm member on her bare stomach as she pressed herself up against him. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:08 PM
She laughed softly. "Thank you..." she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Just one night without the night mares... it's all I ask for now." It wasn't clear if she was talking to him or saying a simple prayer to whoever would listen. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:11 PM
"I will give you more than one night Ari but we will start off with just one for now. He then wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. His warm body up against her letting her know it is ok. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:13 PM
She whispered her thanks and slowly relaxed against him. It wasn't long before a soft whimper and a sigh let him know she was asleep. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:14 PM
He stayed awake for a few hours more making sure she was ok before he too fell asleep holding her. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 4:47 PM
* * * * * * *
[4:49 PM]
She was in the observation lounge, her PaDD in her hands as she stared at the stars. A cup of lavender tea on the floor beside her where she sat leaning up against a chair. The computer would list her as in the location, but looking into the room, she wasn't able to be seen. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 4:53 PM
Jean was looking for the captain to have some items signed and walked into ther room where the computer told her she was. Looking around he didn't see anything at first. Decidedly he walked into the room some more to look around and saw her.
"Captain! Why aren't you in ther chair?"<e>(edited)
[4:57 PM]
Oh!
LlewelPendragonToday at 5:07 PM
She looked up, stretching her legs out, kicking her nearby boots to the side. "Stuck in that bridge chair often enough. This is comfortable." She glanced at the PaDD in his hand. "Need something?" She smiled up at him. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 5:09 PM
And there went her boots finally. Laughing a bit he sat down next to her and handed her the PaDD. "Oui. I need your approval on three items."<e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 5:18 PM
She took the padd and crossed her legs. "What's this?" She glanced at the files, reading then over. "Duty roster looks good..." she checked it off. "Go ahead and authorize Jensen's three days off. He and Akers agree gonna try and get permission from her folks to get married while we're here. His supervisor's already fixed the roster.... and what else?" <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 5:22 PM
"That is nice. I wish them the best and I will have my family send a crate of our finest to them. And the third thing is To move Commander Wulf out of VIP quarters to senior officer quarters where he belongs." He said the last thing flatly. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 6:29 PM
She looked up at him a long moment. "No..." Her hand held the padd back towards him. "He's more than a department head. He holds status equal to, if not above, you and I. He deserves to be in the quarters where we're located. Besides, his office is already set up in the room next to his quarters." She looked at him a moment. "Is it you don't like him in our corridor? Or you don't like him across from my room?" She wasn't angry, merely asking.<e>
CaptainFalconToday at 6:55 PM
He chuckled a bit. "To be honest like I always am to you, at first it was because it he was across from you. He doesn't need to know everything going on in this ship even if he is intel. What we or you do is our business and ours alone. But after having that meeting with him and finding how much he still thinks he is in charge, he needs to really know his place. He can have another officer in another room. Why does he need an extragavent room for his office when mine are far less superior to his and yours barely matches his? He is intel. The damn medic doctor can take control of this ship if she wanted to with any reason, does that mean we should give her VIP quarters as well? No. He is a senior officer like myself and deserves senior officer quarters. What are you going to do when we actually get enough guest on a mission that really do need those rooms Captain? Tell them to suck it up in the hood because intel is here and they are better then you all? I think not. I totally get where you are coming from but this is a big no for me. But you are in charge. He needs to be treated like a regular senior officer. I do not go back to Earth and to the academy and they start laying out the red carpet for me because I am an XO or in Intel. No. They treat me just like they would any other senior officer or senior advisor.
[6:57 PM]
I remember what you told me a cuple days ago while we were laying together and holding each other. I will make every attemp to be there and help him but I will treat him like a senior officer with experience not because he is intel and not because he used to be somebody on this ship before."
[6:57 PM]
I also have one more request after this one is resolved." <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 7:15 PM
Ari listened to him and frowned. "I think you are being a little over dramatic. We have never, in the history of the Bonnie ever needed the VIP quarters to that extent. And I won't make him move his office. It is already set up and the crew knows that's where they can find him. I will consider his living situation, but again, I make no promises. But I give you my word, I will give it a thought and let you know tomorrow." She cocked her head slightly, her body turned to rest her elbow on the chair she was sitting against. "So what is this other request?" <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 7:27 PM
He bowed his head. "Merci and I only ask that you think about it and I am not being over dramatic. I am French and we are always just the right amount of drama." HE laughed.
[7:33 PM]
I got word that Braumann entered the armory with a code. His former code to be more exact for when he was the chief before and the XO. For one, the code should always be changed whenever someone that has access to it leaves and the fact that it was not changed by the new armory chief since that long of a time ago is not very good. He also does not need the codes to the armory. He can store stuff there like anyone else and if he wants to request something or put something in there then it can be arranged that he be let in and let him handle business. But he does not need to know the code to that door specifically or any other for that manner. He can request access like everyone else and if he needs to some secret squirrel stuff then he can be alone, but again, NOT TO HAVE ACCESS to the armory or anything else that sensitive." He looked at her for a bit then continued. "I have been scanning my quarters and office for bugs and listening devices and I suggest that you do the same. Because you told me that he himself would not do it but if he was ordered to, then the obiendiant slave that he is, will." <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 7:46 PM
She frowned and took a deep breath. "First of all, I will not sweep my quarters. There is nothing that happens there that is anything I want or need to hide. And I do not believe Baumann would do such a thing whether ordered or not. He knows he can ask me anything and I will be honest with him to my very core." She angered at the thought of someone bugging her quarters, but she knew he never would. "As to his access codes. I reactivated them. His old code is the one he remembers so it just made sense. And yes, when he was harmed in the last mission, his codes were changed. But no... I will not revoke them. If he has something stored in the armoury, then he is doing it out of a courtesy to me. He doesn't have to store anything there. The safeguards on his office are far more sufficient. It's a matter of courtesy and trust that he puts it in the armoury. He cannot get into the ship's weapons' locker, only the room and his own locker. And I will not take that from him." She stood up and walked to the massive ceiling to floor and wall to wall windows that lined the observation suite. She crossed her arms over the crimson tunic top. Her black leggings almost disappearing against the darkness of space beyond her. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 7:57 PM
"Then That is fine. Just so as we are clear and now I know more." He got up and ent over to her but stood to the behind and right a bit because he saw her cross her arms. "So what now?" <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:09 PM
"I don't know how to make this work... us," she pointed to herself and him, "or you two or even him and I." She took a deep breath. "It kills me you two aren't crazy about one another, and it kills me he's forced into the position he is in because he didn't want some stranger in the position. And I don't know how to let someone care for me because it's been so long I'm scared to let go." She shook her head. "All three of us are in a bad place, Jean. And I don't know how to fix it." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:14 PM
He lowered his head and whispered. "I do not know how many times I have told you that you were not alone." Then he looked up at her reflection. "All I know was that I thought Iwas making some ley way into you trusting more and being a team member more. Then he comes in and it is square one again. Like everything I have saying to you doesn't matter now. Dosen't count because he didn't say it. All he is is an old friend that returned to the ship. Not the XO and not a love interest, just a plain old friend. And if you keep pushing me away like you and run and hide like you do, then you will forever be alone." With that he turned and started to walk away. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:21 PM
He was nearly to the door when she spoke. "You are right..." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:23 PM
He stopped and turned his head to the right but not his body and not looking at her. "Right about what?" <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:33 PM
She closed her eyes. "That I push you away. It has some to do the Baumann, but not entirely. Mostly, it's just me." She moved back to where she had been and sat back on the floor. Ari pulled her knees up and wrapped her around around her legs, her right arm fiddling with her padd beside her. "I won't lie. It's out me a bit out of balance having him back here. I thought he was dead. And I admit I pretended he was alive and well and married to some nurse who had helped him. I never asked about him after he left the ship." She sighed. "I didn't want to know he was dead. And now here, he is. Larger than life and with a job that took our friendship and warped it beyond all recognition. He won't open to me anymore because any day he could have to sacrifice me for the good of the ship or the Fleet. Or just plain lie to my face about something he does or doesn't know."
She looked up at him. "That's what we talked
about. When I didn't bring you to listen to his initial orders here. Because it wasn't anyone else's business. He has gone thru hell and back, alone, after his accident. And now he destroys the rest of his life and gives up any chance of happiness to be the Intel officer on my ship because he doesn't want to me have to deal with a stranger in a position I inherently can't trust."
[8:35 PM]
She looked back out the window. "And then that night we were together. You made me forget everything. No pressure, no nothing. I was no one's Captain, no one's keeper. I had no responsibilities and no conscious to keep but my own. And for that moment. It felt good." She smiled up at him. "It felt really good. But I don't know how to give more than that. I don't know how to do anything but just 'forget in the moment'. And you deserve so much better than that. And it kills me I can't. I don't know how." <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:44 PM
He still didn't turn around but listened to her. "You also have to sacrifice the ship or crew for the good of Starfleet and you have to lie sometimes to keep certain things secret as well. That is not any different than him. I say you two should be together. If you can't be with me not only in mind as well as body, then I do not want you and I do not want to use you and I know likewise is the same. There appears to be true love between you two and no one nor anything should get in your way. Goodbye Captain." <e>(edited)
LlewelPendragonToday at 8:54 PM
"Good... then I'm alone again and it's finished." She took a deep breath, grabbed up her padd and headed for the door. She paused long enough to look at him. "Cause he won't have me, either. He doesn't want to care for me only to have to lie to me the next day, or throw me out an airlock on orders. So now you two can be great friends and enjoy your drinks and laugh over the Captain who can't make up her mind between the XO she doesn't know how to open up to, and the friend she can never open up to. Good night, Commander." She went past him, her shoulder brushing his chest in the tightness of the doorframe and headed for her quarters, her shoes forgotten on the floor of the room behind her. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 8:59 PM
He just shook his head and cried a bit standing right there alone in more ways than one before noticing her shoes. He picked them up and wiped his tears away the best he could. He went to her quarters and pressed the chime. <e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 9:02 PM
There was no command to enter, merely the opening of the door. Ari was at her desk, head down, gazing away from the door and out the window. "What?" She sounded tired and worn out. But she was also building her walls back up. She was calm and not crying. <e>
CaptainFalconToday at 9:08 PM
He stepped in and wanted desperately to yell at her but didn't. "You forgot your shoes." He stated sitting them down on ther floor. "And you forgot to let me retort to your tantrum. Let me make this as perfectly clear as I can. I love you Ari. I would like for you to love me to. I cannot go an hour without thinking of you and not sexually. I love the moments that we share just holding each other or talking, even if it's about work. I am head over heels for you but if you can't reciprocate with mind and body, then I do not know what to do. All I know what and how to do is love you. Please let me love you and hold you?"<e>
LlewelPendragonToday at 9:17 PM
She looked up as he spoke. She stood up and moved to take the offered boots. "Thank you." She moved to the door to set them down. Leaning on the door, she watched him. Slowly she shook her head. "I don't know what love is anymore, Jean. I care for Baumann, I can't and won't lie to you about that. But with him unwilling to reciprocate, then it's not something I can find out." She looked at the floor. "But it's different with you. I can talk to you about anything." She laughed and glanced up. "Some things we don't agree on. But those things don't matter. I want arms around me. I want to sit on the couch and watch the stars and discuss shift rotations and dinner plans. To work out with someone who will laugh when I struggle and let me laugh when they show off. And if that's love... or leads to it. It's what I want. I don't know what will happen. I only know that's what I have to start with. It's all the foundation I have to give. And only you can decide if it's enough." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:35 PM
"Then let us go to the couch so I can hold you and watch the stars." He then just bent over and picked her up in his arms and went over to the couch and laid her down then laid down next to her and just held he tight against him. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:39 PM
She gasped in surprise as he lifted her. As they settled on the couch, she turned her back to him so they fit better on the narrow couch and her arm covered his as he wrapped around her. "Stay tonight... please." She turned her head to look at him. "I don't want to be alone. I want an arm around me, to remind me how it feels." She looked back at the table in front of her
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:42 PM
"As you wish." Was all he said and snuggled against her the best way he could and had to adjust himself so he was not poking her in the rear and then kissed her head. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:50 PM
A few hrs later, the lights dimmed from lack of activity, Ari stirred slightly. A minor jerk that left her tense a moment. Then she sighed and relaxed. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:52 PM
That woke up Jean whom did readjust himself and held her close once again and kissed her head and softly whispered. "I am her Madam. No need to fuss or worry. I got you." He then kissed her again. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 9:54 PM
She settled a moment, then woke up with a soft scream. "NOoooo. PULL UP!" she was panting and struggled in his arms. Still half caught in sleep, she didn't struggle hard. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 9:58 PM
He held her tight and kept her arms and legs from flailing around and hitting him. Once under control he then let her know again. "I am here Ari. Rest easy and do not worry. I love you." He then kissed her head again and kept ahold of her until she calmed down and then let go. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:00 PM
She slowly calmed and became still except for shaking. "Jean.." she rolled to face him, her face pressed to his chest. "We were tumbling into the back hole. It was all I could see on the view screen. We tumbled over and over and it kept getting closer... it was so black...." She sighed and shook her head trying to clear the dream. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:06 PM
"It is ok Ari. I am here and it was just a dream. Please. You are safe and in my arms. Nothing is going to happen to you. I promise." He then kissed her on the lips nice and steady. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:07 PM
Her hands gripped the front of his shirt in reflex as he kissed her. Her lips parting slightly as he pressed closer, <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:15 PM
He kept kissing her and passionatly to let her know it was all ok and she was safe and sound. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:31 PM
She melted against his body and kissed him back. When they finally broke the kiss, she reached up to touch his cheek softly. A soft smile perked up the side of her lips. "And already, you bring me comfort." She shivered and pressed her head to his chest. "I had almost lost them all. I was so foolish... had to be the rescuer. I almost cost everyone their lives, Jean." She shivered slightly in his arms. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:37 PM
HE kissed her head and held her tighter. "It's ok Ari. It's all over now and we are all safe. You are safe." <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:40 PM
She took a deep breath. "Keep me straight, Jean... can you do that? Don't let me get caught up in others to the point I forget those I am responsible for, first and foremost. Take me aside, tell me, make me see..." She looked up at him. "Can you do that? Can you tell me that flying into the darkness and unknown on some noble cause is only worth it if we all come out the other side?" She needed that. Millet would be there, on the bridge, constantly at her shoulder, in her ear, keeping her from leaping off the edge because the water below was shiny. With no regards for how shallow the landing might be. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:43 PM
"Oui. I can and I will Ari. I promise you that much." He then softly kissed the top of her head. "What do you want to do now?" <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:44 PM
"Will you come to bed and hold me?" She laughed slightly as she asked. "I don't think either of us will sleep well here." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:46 PM
"Yes I will dear." He then got up and streched then bent down and picked her up like before and carried her to her bed and laid her down and pulled the covers from under her and got into the bed as well and put the covers up over them and held her tight. "Oh. Did you want to change or something first?" <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 10:51 PM
She smiled, and laughed, as he once more scooped her up like a child. Once in bed, she nodded. "I need to clean up first. You are welcome to as well, unless you want to go to your quarters then come back... it's up to you." She slipped from the covers and headed into the bathroom and closed the door. The sink water was running a moment later. <e>(edited)
CaptainFalconYesterday at 10:57 PM
"I do not have to go to my quarters but I do not wish to stay in my uniform." Once she got up and went to the bathroom he got up and stripped naked and got back into bed and waited for her. Unless she was going to take a shower then he would join her. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:01 PM
She didn't take a shower, but she came out in a thin spaghetti strap tank top and a pair of matching short shorts of deepest blue. Her face was freshly watched, the last remnants of tears were gone. As she crawled into bed she moved close to rest her head on his shoulder. She bit her lip then whispered softly. "Are you upset I did not come to be naked." <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:05 PM
He kissed her. "No. In fact what you have on turns me on more than you being naked. But this is not about that. This is about you and I sharing intimacy in every form and by holding you tight tonight will be mine. What comes of it is up to you but I will try to restrain myself." She would feel his warm member on her bare stomach as she pressed herself up against him. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:08 PM
She laughed softly. "Thank you..." she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Just one night without the night mares... it's all I ask for now." It wasn't clear if she was talking to him or saying a simple prayer to whoever would listen. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:11 PM
"I will give you more than one night Ari but we will start off with just one for now. He then wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. His warm body up against her letting her know it is ok. <e>
LlewelPendragonYesterday at 11:13 PM
She whispered her thanks and slowly relaxed against him. It wasn't long before a soft whimper and a sigh let him know she was asleep. <e>
CaptainFalconYesterday at 11:14 PM
He stayed awake for a few hours more making sure she was ok before he too fell asleep holding her. <e>